Got an interesting call last night.. It was Sofia, telling me how bad person I am and that I just wanted her to leave, so that I could keep both of the guys to myself... I tried to explain the real reasons and that I haven't even met the guys after Sofia left, but.. She didn't believe me.. :/

No comments..

It's been a while from the last time I wrote.. I actually forgot I ever started writing this blog.

However, a lot has changed since January..
First, in the end of summer I moved in Helsinki and have been living here for a couple of months now, with my best friend Sofia.
Second, I moved here because of my studies.. I got accepted in a school and that's why I had to move.
Third, studying is not the only reason that made me move here..


It all started on Friday 16th. I had just finished a long week of work in McDonald's (I think everyone already knew that's where I work) and just wanted to stay at home and relax. Watch TV or read something. But Sofia (my BFF) had other plans. She called me, telling me she wants to go out, to "our" club. It had been almost two months since we went there last time on that Friday 20th, in January. I guess I got a little scared of what happened that night. So, after that I had spent all weekends helping Mom at home, playing with my sister, snuggling on the couch with my boyfriend (not telling his name because I don't want him to get involved in this) watching a movie or something like that. And EVERY weekend Sofia asked me to go out with her. And I ALWAYS found an excuse to stay at home.. But, since nothing strange had happened in a while (no raven attacks or anything), I decided to go. It was also Sofia's birthday on 17th, so I REALLY couldn't say no. :D

First, when we got into the club, we ordered our favorite drinks (piña colada..yummy!) and headed to the dance floor. Then a couple of drinks more, but not many. Then we danced until we got tired and went to get a table. We had been sitting there for a while, when I saw them.. Two guys, about our age, staring at us! Not that other guys weren't looking at us, but there was something different in these two. I just couldn't tell what..

They stopped next to our table and we started talking.. They told they were just visiting the town and I'm sure you can guess where they told they're living.. In Helsinki, of course.. It starts to make sense, right..? However, they're actually not from Finland at all, but they told they're both here because of their studies, as exchange students.. I've always been interested in other cultures.. So, wow.. I got really interested now. Okay, not in THAT way, because I already had the best boyfriend I could imagine and I would never betray him.. But talking to other guys is not betraying, is it?;o They told they came here from Italy.. Which I should have guessed from their brown eyes and dark hair.. And also from their names, Gabriel and Lucas. We stayed with these guys for the rest of the night until the club was closed and it was time for us (Sofia & I) to go home.. I really had fun and I'm sure Sofia did, also. :)

But this doesn't really explain the third reason I moved in Helsinki.. Why would I do it for some guys I only met once? Well, actually we didn't meet them only once.. Because the next weekend we went to that club and there they were again.. What a coincidence! Or was it? Since then we started going to that club almost every weekend.. I'm not sure why.. But we both felt like we had to see them again..and again..
We continued like this for a month or two.. Being always too tired to do anything else.. I even quit my job in McDonald's, telling everyone I did it because I need to get ready for the entrance examinations of schools.. Actually I wasn't getting prepared for them at all.. But somehow I got accepted in one school, just not the one I really wanted to get in. I think I was getting myself in big problems and people around me could sense that. My mom was really worried and so was my boyfriend, but I told them everything was okay.. Because I really thought so. I didn't really understand what I was doing. And neither did Sofia..

So, in the end of this summer we got an apartment in Helsinki and moved.. I went to school and Sofia got a job in a barbershop, as she is a hairdresser. And every weekend we went out, with those two guys. I told Mom I had so many things to study that I really didn't have time to go home in weekends.. But the story didn't work with my boyfriend.. He didn't believe me. After a while he told he had enough of lies and the thing that we never met anymore.. So, he broke up with me.. :( That kind of woke me up and brought me back to this reality. What the hell had I done all this time? I had been so stupid.. I had lied to people around me, spent all my money for going out every weekend and failed everything I should have been doing..

I realized this about a month ago.. I decided to put my life back in order and stop being stupid. I told about this to Sofia, but she was looking at me like I was crazy. She didn't agree with me. She thought there was nothing bad or wrong in what we had been doing and that life is supposed to be just fun. So, she decided to continue in the same way.. But I told her and the guys that I wouldn't be going out anymore, except for school and work, if I only can get a job somewhere. Sofia got really mad with me at first, but after a while she said she doesn't even care. That I can do whatever I want. So, since then, I've been studying and looking for a job, while she continued partying and even got fired, because she's always too tired to work..

And what I did next, makes me feel like I have betrayed my best friend.. But I did it for her own good. About a week ago I called her mom and told what she's doing and everything. Then her mom told her to come back home immediately, and even though Sofia is 18 and can already decide of her own life, she had to go back, because her mom told her that if she didn't, her family would never speak to her anymore. I know her life is not my business, but we have known each other since we were kids and I feel like she's my sister and I have to take care of her.. I wish eventually she will understand and forgive me.. What do you, guys, think? Did I do the right thing?

Now I'm here, all alone..